Believe

I was at my father's place about five days ago and got a picture of this. This was taken on the second floor. It was like three in the morning when I saw it and at first I thought it was a bug till I flipped on the light. I watched it climb stunned till it was out of sight. So next time someone tells you Ninja Frog doesn't exist show them this picture as proof. Happy nights till next time everyone. Hope you got a laugh out of this as well.

Its ninja frog!

Detective Frank Supersluth

Hi all its Ross and I had to share this one. It may be a few days late but on Saturday night Ann was back with Ted and Stacy. So Ann gets him some kitty treats and everything was okay and he had some then walked off. At some point that night the notebook that had his kitty treats on it got closed and we were all confused when he came back trying g to eat Stacy's notebook to get to the kitty treats he could smell. At first we thought he was trying to shove her lottery ticket onto the floor then we realized what was going on. We opened it right after and he got up on the ottoman where it was sitting and took one cat treat like a dog running off with it. The chance for entertainment value was too good to pass up so we closed the notebook the next three times he did this. By the end we couldn't stop laughing and Frank had caught on so he stayed to finish his snack. Happy nights till next time everyone.

Mind fucking & possession

Okay well last night I got to see something I have wanted to since I heard about it listening to the Dark Side podcast. I got to see a mind fuck and I can say I honestly laughed my ass off from watching it. I know it'll sound mean that I did later but it was great and I loved witnessing it since no one knew it was coming and it was so spontaneous. 

Okay well here's how it went down. Ann and I were sitting around in the front room when her cell phone goes off. It was her 17 year old daughter calling from the other room. Her T.V was turning itself on and off without her or Frank clicking the remote. So she was all scared and had her mom come in and Ann saw it happen too. I think it just malfunctioned but Stacy (Ann's girl) is convinced her television is possessed. So when it happened with Ann in the room they unplugged the T.V and she started calming down. Well I said it was a malfunction so they had to prove to me it wasn't. So they brought me in and plugged it back in. Nothing happened as we waited there in the dark for it to turn itself on again. Unseen by Stacy Ann picked up the remote and clicked power so Stacy freaked out and ran from the room crying hysterically. Ann thought she was laughing at first so we laughed our asses off and she stopped laughing when she realized her 17 year old was crying her eyes out on her bed and refused to go back and sleep in her room again. She took a few things and took over her mom’s room. Because she was so scared of the T.V after the little prank she tried to unplug every television in the house. Needless to say I wouldn't let her do that aside from her own. She also turned Ann's T.V so it was facing the wall while she sleeps because she claimed it was looking at/watching her. Now Ann has to sleep on the couch because her daughters pissed at her and won’t let her have any of the bed.  Meanwhile I got great entertainment for the night and even though its mean I won’t feel bad that she was mind fucked like that after she’s been a bitch to me all week for no reason.

If it turns out her T.V is haunted though they want to get rid of it so I have agreed to take it to ward off evil spirits (Stacy) from visiting once I get moved or to sell to someone really into paranormal phenomena. Either way I'll win so why let them take a perfectly good T.V out to the street to throw away.

Okay well that's it for now but keep reading. Hope you liked reading this as much as I liked retelling it to you all. I have a sudden need to go watch ghost busters so till next time.

Catching Up

 Warning: This will be a really long post because Ive been gone so long.
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Wow I can hardly believe its been almost two weeks since I (Ross) made a post on here. Sorry about that. Ive been busy recently. Well let me jump right too it a little bit after where I last left off. Oh yeah well Ann had to go to Columbus to get some muscle relaxers because her menopause was kicking in bad and she couldn't take hormone therapy because it would give her cancer. That didn't go as planned but her daughter and I went with her. Before we went to her appointment we visited an old friend of hers. hes funny as hell and a giant to be quite honest. (the guys built like a brown bear) So we hung out at his place after getting lost and him having to find us. Then we went to her appointment. (Never go to a free woman's health clinic for good help thinking its guaranteed because sorry girls but it isn't or at least not in this case.) The nurse listened to her say whats been going on and proceeded to tell her she was infected with the devil because she was connecting things that for the most part aren't all there. some of them are though  then the nurse prayed with her for an hour solid. After that they sent us to downtown to get a script for some meds and get checked out by a real doctor. We all got to the place they told us and the window said everything was moved to the hospital on parsons avenue. (for all those who have never been to there let me enlighten you. Pasons Avenue is not the kind of place you wanna be after dark and you dont really wanna be there long in the day light ether. Its one of those places where if you go into a parking lot you'll see broken car window glass all over the ground and if you watch the news you'll hear about a stabbing or shooting in one of the school or somewhere else there. Kinda like the bottoms in Columbus or the Bronx in New York) Anyway we went there and there was a very long line already and the assistants came out to tell everyone only one-hundred people from that county would be looked at and that they expected they would get through them by 9:30pm because the doctors wouldn't show up till 7:00pm. There are times where you just have to say "fuck it I dont feel like getting stabbed" and this was one of them so we left.

From there we went to see my aunt/big sister. Okay I'm only explaining this once so pay attention. I say aunt/big sister because when she was ten my mom (her sister) adopted her making her legally her child hence my big sister but the fact that shes my moms sister makes her my aunt too. Okay well she is my favorite aunt for good reason and is just cool as hell. I mean who else will be super excepting, give great advice, and let their 8 year old watch horror movies lol. Any way we got there and came right in and were met by her husband's miniature pincher. (It's the size of a chiwawa and the thing acts like its on crack or something all the time.) So we sat down and talked for a while. I asked her what she thought of a few job ideas I had on where I should try to work (still unemployed). She told us her work is only 3 days a week for full time but like twelve hour long shifts. Id love a job like that but I dont think I could deal with working in a retirement home as a male nurse. We talked for a few hours then went to see our good friends Ted and Debby. (I know wired quiescence we have a friend with the same first name and we have no clue how that happened at all) Anyways Debby and Ted gave her some good advice and we talked for a few hours. before heading home.

Then came last weekend. Okay well before I left I checked my weight on my old bathroom scale (I need to get a digital already). The thing is evil and said I was 210LB and since in only 5'8 that puts me like fifty pounds over weight. So on Friday around noon my father came and picked me up to go to my cousins wedding. We got to where he lives and had to wait till my half sister got out of school. So he showed me his new Google Blu Ray player (I so want one now). I showed him a few animes he might like since I'm really into anime and he gets YouTube to pull with that thing. Then we all loaded up and went for what would be a six hour long drive to Pennsylvania if we didn't drive so damn slow, stop so much, and take a longer rout than necessary. It took us eight hours to get there. That's a long time when you have to sit in the back of a dodge mini van. So after that wonderful trip there I was dropped off at my aunt and uncle's house to stay there while they went with my half sister to stay in a hotel. I was glad we did it that way because his wife is a pain in the ass to share a hotel room with and they wouldn't book two. I got to meet my cousin's new black boyfriend and he was really cool and respectful. hes one of those cultured black people who doesn't do the rapper fuck those bitches stuff. I stayed in the large bedroom they use as a laundry room/office. That's great because it has a door and all but the draft from the front door if someone leaves the entry way door that connects to the rest of the house comes right up the stairs into that room so its the second coldest room in the house and I was sleeping in a sleeping bag with a pillow. So the next day comes along and I go down for breakfast and it started going down hill from there. I poured honey which I think is too sweet over my food instead of syrup and had to eat it that way. then after eating I went to see my uncle Jim. I found him in the dinning room after a bit but he was with my grandfather peat who I really dont like because he made the family turn on my mom including my father. He asked what I was into these days and I said I liked to study and he asked what so I said adult subjects and had to go on to explain that I'm studying to get more into BDSM. My grandfathers room mate was all confused so mu uncle had to explain it to her then everything got all quiet after a short lecture on safety. From there I had planned to take a shower thinking I could get one before the wedding at the last moment because surely no one else thought of that. I was wrong and had to skip my shower and get dressed. Oh yes yet another disaster. I left my dress shirt back at home in Ohio so I had to barrow one. then I went to put on my suit and the pants didn't want to zip up or button because id put on weight since my father bought them for me after graduation the previous year (Never buy form fitting clothes if you want them to last). Eventually I got then to button and zip and it not only was crushing my crotch but also made it heard to breath along with slightly tearing near the zipper. Once they were on I couldn't bend down to put on my socks or shoes so I had to ask my grandmother to do it for me like a little kid. I was so ashamed by that and my uncles daughter who isn't related to me by blood laughed at me. I went for a run after I got them on because I was hoping that if I ram for the hour before the wedding my stomach might loosen up a bit. it did a little but when I took off the belt that helped too but not much. The best man was real cool and polite when he heard me tell him all this and being a big guy himself had experienced it. So we went to the wedding and reception. I got a lecture from my great uncle about marriage when I told him if id caught the grader belt it would be a curse not a blessing since I think of marriage as a form of legal slavery and unhealthy to stay in if your only staying because you cant afford a divorce. My father was mortified when his 8 year old caught the flowers to say who would be married next. Once we got back I was happy to take off the suit and declared I was going on a diet because most of my fat doesn't go to my stomach it goes to my ass instead so yeah I have a great ass but I have to wear a 37 to fit it which isn't really good for me since I was like 179LB less than three years ago. The next day we left and the ride was longer because my grandmother was coming back with us and my dads new kid was acting like a brat.

Okay that brings us to this week. I got home and Ted and his wife had me watch their daughter all this week since Ann decided to go out on the rode with him for a week. On Tuesday I checked my weight and it says I dropped three pounds. Stacy's been okay to deal with alone until I call her mom to see how things were going then she turned into a brat till I handed my phone to her to talk to her mom. Today shes been a bitch giving me the silent treatment for making her do some dishes and she got all pissed off earlier and started throwing my stuff out me window and on the front lawn. Aside from that today I walked all over town trying to find a place that would let Ted park his truck for free for the weekend then I came back and have been online and watching a horror movie marathon with Ann's bird ever since. We are watching the VHS tapes of the Halloween and nightmare on elm street together. I love the old Halloween before Rob Zombie ruined it. Oh and by the way I just checked my scale again and I'm down to 204LB :) . I need to start eating more fruits and vegetables if they will get me to the weight I want to be at (164LB). Well that's it for now. Thanks to everyone who read this all and I hope you enjoyed it. Till next time.

Kitty nip fun and a new friend

Hey its Ross, well tonight we added a member to our house. His name is Frank and hes a three year old cat. When we got him home he was shy but curious so he looked around and explored. His tail has this wired ringed feel like its always stiff when its touched. He knocked over stuff when he walked beside the stand by the couch. Well to get him to loosen up I got him stoned and gave him cat nip. (always a good idea for cats you aren't use to lol. It helps a little.) He sniffed around a little before he caught on to the smell. When he does it was just entertaining for all. He started off using the carpet I sprinkled with cat nip as a scratching post, then after that things got strange. He started licking the carpet and rolling around on the floor. Shortly after that he found a slipper and apparently the slipper was offensive to him so he had to kick its ass. He was so stoned that he didn't even pay attention to the laser light. We were laughing our asses off. I think he'll be a good addition to our home and I'll try to be his friend till I move out. He seems to really like me though so I don't think it will be too hard. Hes like super loveable and friendly with everyone so far. While I type this hes busy getting into shit so I guess I should go find out what hes into, so till next time keep reading and have fun.^_^